Before our 3rd PK came into this world (of course on her very own unique terms and 2 weeks overdue) the Zac Brown Band came out with a record, "Uncaged." I've been a fan of him and his band for quite some time so naturally I downloaded the CD. The 7th track is called Natural Disaster. From the moment I heard the song, I knew it matched our soon to be child perfectly. I knew our 3rd was gonna be a girl, and a force to be reckoned with, from the moment I knew of her existence.
The song describes a women who is apologetically who she is. She commands respect and has so much presence in any room. She has a smile that can truly take your breath away or tell you to go to hell. She is never intentionally mean but she does what she wants. She is "like rain when she rolls in, but there is sunshine in her thunder, she's coming around the bend, she's holding lightening with both hands." If you've met my 3rd child, you know this to be true.
The song goes on to say, "she was a preacher's daughter.. and the rebel in her soul brought her to me", oh the irony. We had no way to know (not even the VIT) that's where we'd be 7 years later. Our sweet love is truly the calm under the storm (that she likely created). I hope that as she matures and grows she learns to harness that power and her presence. It's one of the things that I strive to emulate. That presence, it's a force. NMC, you keep rolling in like thunder, you be the river, a force to be reckoned with always. I have a feeling you always will be. I love you to the moon, around the stars, and back.
Love,
Mama
Tuesday, October 22, 2019
Sunday, October 20, 2019
How long will I love you?
How long will I love you
As long as stars are above you
And longer if I can
How long will I need you
As long as the seasons need to
Follow their plan
How long will I be with you
As long as the sea is bound to
Wash up on the sand
How long will I want you
As long as you want me to
And longer by far
How long will I hold you
As long as your father told you
As long as you can
How long will I give to you
As long as I live through you
However long you say
How long will I love you
As long as stars are above you
And longer if I may
How long will I love you
As long as stars are above you
-Ellie Goulding
Our sweet days of a family of six are quickly passing. There is a lot of anticipation. A lot of feelings as we all know that our "normal" will never quite be the same. But isn't this what happens as we all grow and change? We leave things and begin new things. I love our not so little family. It is messy and loud. It is beautiful and soul-filling. We dance through each day and it's sometimes a very long day and sometimes a very short day. As I try to soak up what are left of these days I am reminded that all of my children are simply on loan to me. A great creator handed them over to me to help raise and bring them to the point where they can choose their own destiny. The commandment is simple, love as I have loved you. So how long will I love you Brynn, Elliot, Nola, Dillon, and God-willing Harrison? As long as the stars are above you...and longer if I may.
As long as stars are above you
And longer if I can
How long will I need you
As long as the seasons need to
Follow their plan
How long will I be with you
As long as the sea is bound to
Wash up on the sand
How long will I want you
As long as you want me to
And longer by far
How long will I hold you
As long as your father told you
As long as you can
How long will I give to you
As long as I live through you
However long you say
How long will I love you
As long as stars are above you
And longer if I may
How long will I love you
As long as stars are above you
-Ellie Goulding
Our sweet days of a family of six are quickly passing. There is a lot of anticipation. A lot of feelings as we all know that our "normal" will never quite be the same. But isn't this what happens as we all grow and change? We leave things and begin new things. I love our not so little family. It is messy and loud. It is beautiful and soul-filling. We dance through each day and it's sometimes a very long day and sometimes a very short day. As I try to soak up what are left of these days I am reminded that all of my children are simply on loan to me. A great creator handed them over to me to help raise and bring them to the point where they can choose their own destiny. The commandment is simple, love as I have loved you. So how long will I love you Brynn, Elliot, Nola, Dillon, and God-willing Harrison? As long as the stars are above you...and longer if I may.
Tuesday, October 8, 2019
Calling all the Holiday Police
If you know me, you know that I love the Holidays. I love Christmas most especially. I love everything about it. The religious aspects, the pagan traditions that surround it, the fact that it brings back some of the most wonderful times of my life, and reminds me on a daily basis of the wonderment that exists in a world that, let's face it, is pretty shitty at the moment. Along with my love of all things Holiday comes the unfortunate and consistent of people feeling they have a right to police all things Christmas. It's not only ridiculous, but it's REALLY irritating and frustrating at times. Recently I saw a meme (posted by another VIT) that basically states, exactly like I feel, " If you see me bumpin to Christmas music, remember it costs $0 to worry about yourself." PREACH!
Every freaking year I have to listen to people tell me how I'm rushing the holidays. What about Halloween?!?!?! What about Thanksgiving?!?!?! Oh, god, the Advent police... enough already. I get it, you want to wait until whenever is comfortable for you to decorate or not decorate. That's cool. It costs me nothing and I don't even blink an eye when I see your naked front yard or window devoid of decoration. Mostly, I just hope you are well. Commentary on people who choose to celebrate, without an imposition on you, early or for a prolonged time, is just rude and wrong. I used to be super judgey about parents who went overboard on birthdays, Halloween costumes for their kids, etc. Guess what, it made me a judgey butt hole parent and kind of a terrible human. So I stopped. Now, go for it! Have a ball. If it makes your heart and soul happy, do it. I might be a little envious but I fully support your right to do it. The one caveat I will always have is, don't do stuff that is offensive, appropriative of other's cultures, or is insensitive. If you wanna start celebrating Halloween in June, go for it! I have some awesome light up pumpkins that you are free to borrow! You really get into Fall? I will come sit and glue together leaves for an epic wreath but I will not go see a Thanksgiving program with pilgrims and Indians...nope. Hard stop. You absolutely adore Valentine's Day, lets get some glitter and doilies!
When you see my posts on social media about whatever the hell kinda tree I have or the Christmas plates I just bought, unless you have something kind to say, just keep on scrolling. If you feel the need to be rude about my love of Christmas, keep it to yourself. Save your time and energy, you won't change me. For those who want to talk about Liturgical seasons, pretty sure Jesus is 100% cool with me celebrating his coming birth, whenever the heck I choose. Again, not your house, not your spouse, not your mom, mind your business. If They really have a problem with it, I'm sure I'll hear about it later. For those who outcry about having kids whose birthday's fall around Christmas (yes, probably not the most awesome time but what can I do?!?!) rest assured the birthday trees that they get EVERY YEAR since they were born seem to be totally fine. If they choose that they don't want to decorate until after their birthdays as they age, we will discuss it, but again, not your business.
So for now, you go listen to whatever podcast, spotify playlist, etc you got going. Right now I'm listening to my personally curated and beloved playlists while I envision just how I want my tree this year. I hope the holiday season (Halloween through the New Year) is wonderful. I know for many it is not, if I can do something to make it less rough, let me know, I'm down for that too. I mean it's still almost 90* in Texas...a girl can dream about a white Christmas. Until then, happiest of all of the holidays, or have a great Tuesday!
Every freaking year I have to listen to people tell me how I'm rushing the holidays. What about Halloween?!?!?! What about Thanksgiving?!?!?! Oh, god, the Advent police... enough already. I get it, you want to wait until whenever is comfortable for you to decorate or not decorate. That's cool. It costs me nothing and I don't even blink an eye when I see your naked front yard or window devoid of decoration. Mostly, I just hope you are well. Commentary on people who choose to celebrate, without an imposition on you, early or for a prolonged time, is just rude and wrong. I used to be super judgey about parents who went overboard on birthdays, Halloween costumes for their kids, etc. Guess what, it made me a judgey butt hole parent and kind of a terrible human. So I stopped. Now, go for it! Have a ball. If it makes your heart and soul happy, do it. I might be a little envious but I fully support your right to do it. The one caveat I will always have is, don't do stuff that is offensive, appropriative of other's cultures, or is insensitive. If you wanna start celebrating Halloween in June, go for it! I have some awesome light up pumpkins that you are free to borrow! You really get into Fall? I will come sit and glue together leaves for an epic wreath but I will not go see a Thanksgiving program with pilgrims and Indians...nope. Hard stop. You absolutely adore Valentine's Day, lets get some glitter and doilies!
When you see my posts on social media about whatever the hell kinda tree I have or the Christmas plates I just bought, unless you have something kind to say, just keep on scrolling. If you feel the need to be rude about my love of Christmas, keep it to yourself. Save your time and energy, you won't change me. For those who want to talk about Liturgical seasons, pretty sure Jesus is 100% cool with me celebrating his coming birth, whenever the heck I choose. Again, not your house, not your spouse, not your mom, mind your business. If They really have a problem with it, I'm sure I'll hear about it later. For those who outcry about having kids whose birthday's fall around Christmas (yes, probably not the most awesome time but what can I do?!?!) rest assured the birthday trees that they get EVERY YEAR since they were born seem to be totally fine. If they choose that they don't want to decorate until after their birthdays as they age, we will discuss it, but again, not your business.
So for now, you go listen to whatever podcast, spotify playlist, etc you got going. Right now I'm listening to my personally curated and beloved playlists while I envision just how I want my tree this year. I hope the holiday season (Halloween through the New Year) is wonderful. I know for many it is not, if I can do something to make it less rough, let me know, I'm down for that too. I mean it's still almost 90* in Texas...a girl can dream about a white Christmas. Until then, happiest of all of the holidays, or have a great Tuesday!
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