What must it be like?

The tiniest PK is our only-born male child. He is growing up in a literal estrogen den. He, day in and day out sees what it means to be a sister, mother, a female growing up in the world. He is sensitive and kind. He is rough and tumble. He is loud, he is soft. He takes up space and has learned how to move aside and allow others to speak. His sisters and sibling teach him daily how to listen and to talk. He hears when they talk about the ways that they are treated, good and bad. He learns from his dad that women's voices are powerful and their hearts are good. He learns that respect is a two-way street. He is learning how to be taken care of and to take care of. He is learning that voices can be used for good and for hurt. He is powerfully protected and loved beyond his own knowing. My daily prayer includes him never forgetting these most important lessons and learning how to balance being a good human and learning how to advocate for others first and himself second. I often wonder, what must it feel like to be the littlest of boys in a house full of generous and powerful women? He gravitates to women, is that because he intrinsically knows them? Are they so familiar that they are the easiest to relate to? 

He has recently begun a new preschool and it is always so amazing when I see him playing with all the little babies, particularly the girls in his mixed-age class. He can sit and play for long periods with baby dolls turn around play with trucks and be Spiderman. The other day I was able to watch (we have camera access to his classroom in a closed circuit format) him lovingly play with a little girl and he was showing her how to rock her baby. His gentleness and willingness to show tenderness is something I hope he never loses. We should all be striving to teach our boys how to be soft and gentle, to allow their emotions to be as close to the surface as their bravery. We should be teaching them to have courage and curiosity. We should be teaching them how to lovingly take care of baby dolls as often as they learn to hit a ball or play with race cars. 

Our sweet and sturdy boy will know, in spite of what the world may try to undo, that his emotions and his kindness are strengths, not weaknesses. He will know that everyone around the table has an equal right to speak and if others are trying to quiet voices, that it is his duty to elevate their voices. To use his privilege to ensure equity exists in all spaces. His sisters and sibling have learned this from the day they were born and now they are teaching him that too and it is a beautiful thing. 

I am filled with pride and prayer that my son and his siblings will be world-changers. They will continue to do the work of undoing and elevation. I love you, my babies, go make good trouble. Momma and Daddy will always support you. 

Radical Love and Joy Finding

This summer has been really hard. This summer has been overwhelmingly joyful. Lately, I've wondered and had many discussions with God. One of the main topics has been around what the lessons of living far from "home" and support systems (we do have them here but for the purpose of this work, I mean life-long friends, family, and framily) have taught and are supposed to be teaching me? Sure, we've learned to make a home anywhere we are. That friends, is priceless. Learning that most things in this life are temporary and permanent things are moveable, adaptable, and will evolve over time. We've learned that happiness is, for so much of the time, a choice. I've learned how to be content with a small circle of support. I've learned that people all over this state are overwhelmingly kind but also that the friendships that have survived time and distance are so very precious. I've learned how to make queso and that truly good Mexican food is HARD to find. 

I've had the privilege to meet so many different people and explore different career and learning experiences. I've seen my children flourish LITERALLY everywhere we've moved. They make friends. They lean into the newness of each place. They have developed amazing relationships with people and moreover with each other. They fight like cats and dogs but they are fiercely beloved to one another also. They have developed and cultivated friendships over the miles. That is a skill that will help them throughout their lives. 

As we lean into year two here in West Texas I believe we have been sent here to radically love. Love our surroundings, our neighbors, our communities. Radical joy and peace are things I'm chasing these days. Maybe we all need to pursue radical love, joy, acceptance, and peace. Perhaps those things that seem insurmountable will reveal a path more easily traversed if we can lean into the next good thing? 

Random thoughts on a Monday...

Wrap of summer 2023

 This summer has been one of trial, tribulation, and extreme joy! It began with surgery, recovery, hospitalization, and humbling. About midway became one of triumph and getting back to the regular swing of life and our first PK celebrating another trip around the sun. The end of the summer brought camps, performances, pool days, dear friends' birthdays,  a trip back home to Nevada, and excitement over the start of a new school year. 

This morning as we completed 4 different school drop-offs and waved each of our children off I said silent prayers over them, their classmates, their teachers, and administrators and asked for a year of learning, kindness, and peace. Each of their teachers worked tirelessly to ready themselves and their rooms to welcome children. I'm so grateful for their work, their love, and the time they spend ensuring our future is well-educated, made to feel loved, and ready to take on a heavy world. Teachers are the real MVPs. 

As I sit in a very quiet home waiting to start my day, staring at the picture I took on our front porch I am reminded that the years pass by more quickly each time. I am reminded that the humans given to me to raise are the perfect mix of all good things. They are kind. They are respectful. They are loving. They are intelligent. They are curious. I pray those qualities continue and they slowly and confidently find their way. I pray they know they are loved beyond measure by us, by their family (near and far), by their church families, and by their friends and teachers. I pray they do their best to learn and love. Everything else will fall into place. 

As you send yours off, prepare for a few more weeks of summer, or think about the people in your life heading out to work or into the world today, know that I pray for a day filled with moments of joy and triumph. 

We made it to August. Summer 2023, it has been real. Thank you for the memories.