Spring In Texas

This weekend we spent doing yard stuff to improve our view from the street. Anytime we undertake these ventures I begin to think about where we are, where we've come from, and where we are going. Yesterday the VIT and I were driving to church and I began talking about my obsessive need to know what 'the next steps' are. Where are we gonna move? What is the new adventure? Where will we live? I'm the person who coordinates the logistics. It is something I excel at. I enjoy it. For the first time in a very long time I'm not in that mode. I'm not ready to stay but I'm also not ready to leave. I'm feeling comfortable in the middle. In the shallows of still water. I know the rapids we've passed through and I see the water picking up speed ahead but for now I'm content to be in the place. 

Yes, it's hard. We are far from the only home our girls have known. We still have at least one crying kid a week begging to go home to Reno. And sometimes I cry with them. I miss my friends there. I miss My Favorite Muffin Bagels. I miss coffee with Nikki. I miss lunch with Tricia. I miss the traffic that picks up with the coming spring/summer events downtown. I miss our church. Easter won't feel the same when it's like 90* outside. I also love a lot of things about this place. I love the porch where it's not under feet of snow. I love that it is March and I'm wearing sandals. I love that we can let the girls dance out in the rain if they want because it's warm. I love that my oldest girl has friends and Daisy Scouts. I love my friends here. There is a lot of loving and sharing that has happened here. I love Ricky and Sister Amor. I love that Corrie knows when things have hit the fan and somehow a bottle of champagne ends up on my door step. I love that Lucy is Lucy. There is a lot of very big love here. 

So as we try to continue to navigate this journey we will dig in the dirt. We will sleep in humid slumber. We will learn to ride this smooth portion and even when the kayak tips and we fall over we will learn to love the moment. Because time stops for no one. But if you're there know that I love and miss you. If you're here know that I appreciate you and love you too.