Like my Father

 There is a new song out by an artist named Jax. The name of the song is Like My Father. This song instantly resonated with me. Not because I saw this sort of relationship played out in my early life but because I am living this with the Curate and our kids are witnessing it. 

The Curate is a wonderful spouse (he can also be a gigantic pain in my butt). He is the kind of for better and definitely for worse. In health and even more in sickness. He lives his marriage covenant to the fullest extent one can. He shows the children and me what everyday love is. Everyday love is consistency. Everyday love involves the same phrases, gestures, and responsibilities being done over and over again. Some might question if everyday love is what one wants? For me, it is a resounding YES. Everyday love takes far more effort than intense beginning love. Everyday love takes persistence, compromise, willingness to keep showing up each and every day, even when you don't want to. Everyday love is realizing you are tired and feeling sad but knowing that your partner loves you and will love you through to the good part again and again. It means recognizing that you want to be a better partner and changing so both of you get the best of each other. 

Everyday love isn't all day love every day. It is knowing that love and commitment can go hand in hand and hopefully at the end of a life together, you had more everyday love than you had anything else. I've spent 13 years with my everyday love. We are different people now than we were then and that is a good thing. It hasn't always been easy, some days it seemed impossible. And while 13 years isn't a lifetime it is significant, especially when it has included almost as many moves, 5 kids, career changes (multiple), and learning how to grow and change with each other. 

As our kids grow up I hope they get to experience both intense beginning love and everyday love. They will need both if they choose to partner up. I hope they find someone to love like their father loves their mom.